"Biting Back takes a compelling look at self-care, setting boundaries, and protecting ourselves from friends, loved ones, enemies, and sometimes even ourselves. Written in a page-turning and warm style, Claudia’s refreshing addition to the self-help shelves offers empowering solutions to effectively remind us to stop inviting troubleinto our homes and souls." -- MELODY BEATTIE, NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLING AUTHOR OF CODEPENDENT NO MORE































Sunday

Every So Often...


I get a little something in my mailbox that looks more or less like what follows below. This is an email I received last Wednesday.

First of all, Slayers are murderous asses. I knew a girl that was not vampir', only goth, and she was raped and murdered by so called slayers. I know many vampir' and they are not afraid of you. You mistakenly harm goths because they are weaker than the vampir', if you ever come across one that is real, you would be in itense trouble, and harmed yourself. Take warning.

Blackwood


Well the first thing I want to say is that I'm certainly pleased to see that people are reading -- reading anything, I mean, but especially that they're reading my blog.

I had the honor of tutoring English Composition during my short time in college, and that was the first thing I'd encourage my tut-ees to do -- TO READ. I'd tell them, boringly enough, "If you really want to learn how to write, then you really ought to learn how to read, too."

I'd almost always recommend they start with the clean, no-nonsense prose of Ira Levin (since so many of them simply needed to learn how to pay attention to what they were saying and to tighten it up; I'd always imagined that Levin's presence in New York made him a natural at clean, tight prose), and I remember throwing a lot of Stephen King and Dean Koontz their way, too. "Find something that makes you want to turn to the next page," I'd say, or," What kind of movies do you like?" I'd ask -- and we'd go from there.

So it makes me glad to see this sort of thing: people reading and people writing; the Internet is so great that way. But I have to wonder if some readers aren't skimming a bit, or whether these kinds of emails I get are simply perfect examples of how most of us see and hear only what we are ready to see and hear.

I mean, how little of my stuff do you have to read to understand that I'm not speaking of vampires in the literal sense that our friend Blackwood here is, or that practical vampire slaying isn't really so much about "murdering" or even "destroying" our vampires, as it is about "revealing" and "transforming" them?

It's a subject that's been much on my mind these days: revelations and transformations and prodigal vampires and all that.

Excuse me a moment, and I'll be back to talk some more about this.

And thanks for reading!




15 comments:

Dwight Wannabe said...

And this is why it should be legal for reasonable people to nudge Darwinism along.

Claud/PVS said...

Dwight DARLING!!! How lovely and I do mean LOVELY to see you!

Jaye Wells said...

Lady, you're the coolest. What a diplomatic response to asshatery.

funforager said...

Guys, where's the love? Here is obviously a distraught man whose friend has been murdered and the reflexive sneer at slayers is his mistaken confusion over the different meanings of this word. PVS is a new take on an ancient archtype, a profoundly deeper look at what it means to take responsibility for what is hurting us.

And I agree that Claudia pegs the source of Blackwood's problem. This is a great example of how we perceive what we are pre-programmed to hear, see and feel. Also, if I'm angry, I will look for the place to dump that anger. So he certainly got to do that. Great post. Love that picture.

PVS/Claud said...

Thanks Jaye. You're pretty cool yourself. Maybe Blackwood really is a Lost Boy. Or Girl.

PVS/Claud said...

Hey Forager,

I love that picture, too. And gee whiz, I was all set there to give a lecture on how we perceive what we are prepared for, and then I forgot. That's chemo for you!

lc

Anonymous said...

great blog, sweetie! hey it was soooo GREAT to see you the other day, and I love seeing the Jennifer celebration shots on here...good for you. I agree, you're so diplomatic, congrats on that. congrats also on your continuing, in fact apparently increasing, ability to slay the friggin vampires, kicking their ugly butts as they come at you in whatever form. onward and upward, claud!!! you rule!
big virtual hug from
Maggie

funforager said...

Maggie you totally rock!

jjdebenedictis said...

Very nice response, and I think you're right that there's probably a blog post in this issue--why do we not see the vampires in our lives sometimes?

Claud said...

Maggie I think you should go into professional cheerleading -- thank you so much for your (always) enthusiasm and affection. You're the sweetest!

and JJ: How nice to see you here. I got all misty for a second...isn't it funny how when someone you haven't seen on your blog for a while is like someone who hasnt' come to your house in a while? You're so happy to see them!!!! Sniff, and I ain't kiddin.

Anonymous said...

There is a need to slay vampires....even though we do let them in initially....sometimes it is because we are to trusting...sometimes they are just to perfect to make go away....until we know for sure....vampires are more afraid of us than we are of them...you see, we hold power over them and they hold nothing over us....that is what frightens them.....so ....be safe....be cool...

Claudia/PVS said...

Hi Anonymous, and welcome!

I just have to ask, is that song, or lyrics to a song you just wrote up there?

Thanks for stopping by!

Anonymous said...

they are neither, just my words that came out at that moment...if you are a song writer you can use them...i am a poet....

Claud said...

Aha! I KNEW something was going on there! :) Very nice!

lc

Anonymous said...

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