You make it sound so simple, this vampire-slaying thing. But how many of us have vampires that are our mothers, husbands or life-long friends? It's not so easy to revoke an invitation to someone you can't totally write out of your life. In that case, do you have some suggestions about how to detach, keep good boundaries and elevate the relationship to a higher level, without a total revocation? Or is it more that the revocation happens on an inner level within ourselves even if we are still in relationship with a vampiric-type person?
Thanks for considering.
Practical vampire slaying is about getting into the light where we can see what we're doing, where we're at, and who we really are. It is pretty simple (as in not complicated), but it does require a bit of willingness, honesty, and dedication -- and it takes practice. It also takes knowing the rules.
One of the first rules of PVS is to forget about rehabilitating the vampire, and start rehabilitating ourselves. What that means in terms of any blood-draining relationships we're involved in (but not ready to be done with -- for whatever reason) is that we must be willing to take the time to look inside ourselves and find our bottom, and I mean our very bottom, line. You mention the word "boundaries," which evokes an excellent image, not unlike an image of the "thresholds" our vampires have to cross before they can suck our blood. Our task is to know exactly where our threshold is (what specific behavior in our vampire we find draining), and what we are willing to risk to defend it (defending our threshold could be mean the loss of an image of ourselves as "nice guys," for instance, or angering the vampire and possibly others). But I think it's possible to maintain a relationship with someone and know exactly where the line is for ourselves about how intimate we will be with them. If talking with them about how we raise our kids, for instance, always ends in a distinct feeling of anemia for us, then we might consider drawing the line (threshold) there. We must be willing, however, to submit to the consequences of this decision -- there can be a good deal of squawking by hungry vampires when the threshold is moved; still, we know our thresholds and respect them, since the first rule is (as we all know!) "A vampire cannot cross the threshold without an invitation from the host." And it's always, always true.
When we live in the light and humbly admit our limitations (know our thresholds, and especially ourselves), we no longer feel the need to apologize for them or for ourselves. This way we are in much less danger of wavering when the vampire tries to talk us out of what we have brought into the light about ourselves and know for certain. It seems that the truth really does set us free after all.